Funny New Year Text Messages
New Year Prayer
God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones that I do,
And the eyesight to tell the difference.
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Q. What are New Year’s resolutions
A. Things that go in one year and out the other.
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A couple invited some people to celebrate a New Year’s First Dinner. At the table, the wife turned to their six year old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?”
“I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied.
“Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said, “Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”
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Valentines Day Quotes by major
"Love is not love that alters when it alteration finds.
Halloween Quotes 1 by major
On Hallowe'en the thing
you must do
Is pretend that nothing
can frighten you
An' if somethin' scares you
and you want to run
Jus' let on like
it's Hallowe'en fun.
Halloween Jokes by major
Q.
Santa Is A Man by major
.
Halloween Jokes 2 by major
What is a ghoul's favorite flavor?
Lemon-slime.
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