Dirty Text Messages
Tell me.is it going in?..yeah ..is it hurting?..ooh yeah ..ouch its hurtin ..ok i wil put it in slowly ..stil hurtin..ahh yeh ..den lets try d other shoe madam
Last nite i coodnt sleep.i wantd u warm against my skin.i wantd u on me.i wantd 2 feel u all over my body.. but i coodnt find u!Where did i put my PAJAMAS?
I luv the way it rubs against the soft pink flesh creatin a creamy foamy liquid, as it thrust in & out up& down, can’t wait til nxt time I LUV MY TOOTHBRUSH
come here.take off ur pants and get on top of me….enjoy me until ur totally satisfied lovingly urs TOILET!!!!
I luv u- I luv u- I luv u almighty,I wish ur pyjamas were close to me nighty.Dont be mistaken.now dont be mislead I mean on the clothesline and not in my bed
Wen i look at the sun i c u!wen i look at the moon i c u!wen i look at the sea I c u… well get out of my way!
From the moment I saw u, I wanted to be inside u, I love ur smell, the way ur tongue feels, the way u tighten and loosen mmmmmmmmmmmmm…………..NEW SHOES!!!!!!!!!!
He came 2 me 1 nite… explored my body… licked- sucked- swallowed & had his fill… wen satisfied he left… I was hurt… DAMN MOSQUITO
In the morning I do not eat because I think of you, at noon I do not eat because I think of you, in the evening I do not eat because I think of you, at night I do not sleep because I am hungry.
Someday u may lose ur hair.u may lose ur teeth- ur money & even lose ur mind.But 1 thing u will never loose is ur good looks.coz u cant lose wot u don’t have!
I had a wet dream about you last night …. I pissed myself laughing when you fell of a cliff!
It goes in dry it comes out wet.the longer its in the stronger it gets.we can have it in bed just you and me…its not what you think its a cup of tea!
Last nite i wantd u.needed u so badly dat it hurt.wantd 2 taste u.i wantd u in me so u could work ur magic on me…but i couldnt find u.u stupid.. PARACETAMOL!
At 1st a little nibble- a slow & temptin lick.i suck & munch my liquid lunch & den i swallow quick! CADBURYS CREAM EGG HOW DO U EAT URS?
Tags: funny text messages, hilarious text messages, text messages, dirty sms messages, rude text messages, love text messages, text quotes, funny text messages, dirty text messages, sms
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You know what they say about life beginning at 40?
Well, they're lying!
I'll be 40 soon, and I was going to title my party- "Nearer to Death than Birth"!
It's got a nice ring to it ,don't you think ?
Save all hairs that come loose when you brush your hair – one day medical science may develop a means of replanting them.
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Do you know why so many marriages don't last?
Answer: Because at the wedding, the bride doesn't marry the best man.
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Yo mamma so fat when she sits around the house she rlly sits around the house!
A grasshopper walks into a bar.
Hilarious Text Messages by major
You asked for a candle and got the sun.
