Dirty Text Messages
A guy wlks ^ 2 a gal ina bar n asks,
“Do u wn2 play mgic?”
“What’s dat?” she replies.
he continues, ”
You cum b2 my plce, av sx, thN DSapER.”
“Doctor, dr, I kip seein lil blk spots B4 my Iyz.”
“Have u seen a dr B4?”
“No, jst lil blk spots.”
Patient: I alw C spots B4 my Iyz.
Doc: Didn’t d nu glasses hlp?
Patient: Sure, now IC d spots mch clearer.
dis 65 y/o wmn S Nked, jumpN ^ n dwn on her bed laffin n singin. Her hubby wlks N2 d bdrm n sEz her. He watches her awhle thN sEz, “You l%k ridiculous, w@ on erth RU doiN?”
She sEz, “I jst got my check-up n my dr sEz Ive d tits of an eighteen-year-old.” She strts laffin n jumpN agn.
He sEz, “Yeah, ryt. n w@ did he sA bout yr 65 yo (_!_)?”
She sEz, “Well, yr nAm nvr came ^.”
Tags: funny text messages, rude text messages, dirty text messages, sms jokes, sms, love text messages, hilarious text messages, funny text messages, text quotes, dirty sms messages
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Submit by major
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Dirty Text Message Jokes by major
hw DY unload a truk ful of X-( babies?
A pitchfork!
waz pink n hrd?
A :@) W a knfe
A bear n a buny r sittN ina 4st takN a sht.
Rude Text Messages by major
Q: hw DY kip yr hubby frm readN yr Emsg?
A: Rename d mail folder 2 "instruction manuals"
Q: hws bn @ a singles bar diFrent frm goin to d circus?
A: @ d circus d clowns dnt tlk.
Girls text joke by major
The three wonders of a woman:
-give milk w/out eating grass
-get wet /out water
-bleed for a week w/out going 2 die.
Rude Text Jokes by major
Q: What's the difference between a tire and 365 used rubbers?
A: One is a Goodyear and the other is a great year.
